BLOG

1/3/2026

ok when am i going to work on my stupid spitso yume amv

12/30/2025

I think I'm going to move to waterfox librewolf acts funny with browser games and screensharing

12/22/2025

Finally got a usb so I can load all the videos from my camera on it! Also winter break is 2 days away so thats neat.

12/21/2025

Blogging here every single day is just reminding me of social media. I need to start making stuff for the sake of myself and not give a rat's ass about what other people think. Caring so much about the opinions of others has made me exhausted. Even seeing all those bulletin messages on my neocities home page sickens me. I don't want to see what people are up to I don't I fucking dont. I should try to find a way to self-host a HTML website.

12/20/2025

I feel empty. All the mindless entertainment the world provides us doesn't fill the empty void in our souls, the void that yearns for more. Perhaps I should fill it with the love of god.

12/14/2025

Now that winter break is approaching im slowly getting the life sucked out of me by my teachers. I have like 3 projects to finish (I already finished my economics project) I have to animate a whole video about the Prophet (SAWS) for Islamic Studies. Which I wouldn't mind if voice recording wasn't a nightmare I spend god knows how long sitting in my dad's bathroom try to record lines with my nasally ass voice. Doesn't help that I'm behind on photosynthesis and I don't understand geometry. I need a miracle I swear to god

I really feel the need to redo my whole index and home page the index page is ugly as fukkk and the home page formatting is a mess

12/11/2025

So I've been using LibreWolf for a few days now...so far so good!But I want to get into torrenting. I'm pretty dumb with all the piracy lingo and stuff, So I should probably brush up on that first. And watch a few tutorials.

12/9/2025

I searched up FireFox on Tumblr for some tips (and also cuz I wanted to see firefox-tan...she's so cute) and then I see that firefox rolled out this update where they're using your data for anything they want and stuff..here's the link. So what now? I'm probably going to move to one of those firefox forks. There's Floorp, Waterfox, and LibreWolf. I'll decide later.

12/8/2025

"F2U with credit" WRONG!!!!! im taking your blinkies

12/7/2025

I cant act normal ever I always have to be a horny little shit right????right???may god take my soul and purge me of my sin. Maybe if I was closer to Allah (SWT) I wouldn't be like this.

12/3/2025

making tsos yumeslop....but im too nervous to post it on a03. I'll probably make a fanfic archive here.

11/30/2025

Nothing better than going outside in the freezing rain to the gas station to get a can of monster and a pack of mentos and drink the monster in an empty parking lot while my hands slowly develop frostbite. This is what life really is about, doing stupid stuff. Anyways, I keep finding myself checking my twitter and discord for messages over and over and over again and I'm quite ashamed because I don't really like using twitter or social media but it's where all the roblox myth fans are. I need to control myself smh >:o/. Also Thanksgiving break ends tomorrow and all I did was go on either the laptop or ipad I need to get a life.

UPDATE

I AM GENUINELY SO HAPPY i finished my spitso fanpage and posted it on the EOTW server...and SPITS0 pinned it! huzzah! It's such an honor 🥰

11/29/2025

This is SPITS0 foreshadowing im sure of it (hehe)

11/25/2025

The idea of suicide is starting to become more beautiful to me.

11/24/2025

I was thinking about the mountain of plushies my sister has, and why we as humans need to keep such useless and unnecessary accessories in our life. And no, having a plushie as a comfort object or something you cling on to that makes you feel happy or safe is excluded. I'm talking about have a HUGE collection of Sonny Angels, Labubus, Squishmellows, and they're just...there. They don't provide any use,they're just "decor". I have a plushie collection, but most of them are really old or were too pricey for me to give away without feeling guilty. Then I started thinking about all kinds of commercial items that seem like the next big thing, but are nevertheless worthless objects painted as "cool" or "trending" in order to keep our fleeting amusement satisfied.

so what should you (If anyone is reading this) take away from this? CAPITALISM THRIVES OFF OF OUR NEVER-ENDING THIRST FOR ENTERTAINMENT. GET A HOBBY, ANYTHING TO NOT GIVE INTO THE MODERN WEB PROPAGANDA WE ARE FED.

11/23/2025

Forgot how much i HATED using the neocities built in code editor. they need to add a preview feature for the love of god im getting sick of this shit. anyways yes i put up the website by now and im so fucking nervous, but im sure it'll be fine ;-;

11/22/2025

I get too comfortable when im around people irl or offline. Sometimes I think of breaking the promise I made to my dad about not cutting myself. And I forgot to bring my razor. Faaannnntastic.

11/21/2025

So far, so good with the blog layout! I tweaked it in school, but it's obviously still subject to change.

11/20/2025

UPDATE: 5:11 PM KARKAT KARKAT!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

UPDATE: 2:43 PM Dismissal is finally here! I'm feeling a bit better and I think my index page is complete! I don't know if i want to upload this to neocities just yet, I'm feeling nervous

I kinda just ruined my whole day by giving attitude to my arabic teacher I want this day to end already |:/

11/15/2025

Cried in front of my therapist today. Embarassing.

11/14/2025

I hate fridays. Well, not really but friday lunchtime in school. Because that's the time when my stupid-as-shit previous 5th grade teacher makes her students read in the library. And mind you, the library is the only place that brings me comfort in the midst of all the inevitable social interaction. They took up all the damn seats, so I'm currently typing this on the stairs. The least they could do is be quite. But they're 5th graders, what do you fucking expect? Anyways I hate being in a K-12 school because these middle and elemantry schoolers make me pray for a school shooting to happen sometimes.